My apologies to Neil Peart.
The following is an incomplete, mercifully restrained collection of headlines culled from various websites (drudgereport.com, injusticeeverywhere.com, wendymcelroy.com, theagitator.com, and othercrap.com) within the last several minutes (with spelling, punctuation, and syntax reproduced as they originally appeared).
PUMP PRICES JUMP ON TIGHTENING SUPPLIES
WHITE HOUSE CRACKS DOWN ON PRESS
1 MILLION THRONG LONDON FOR ROYAL WEDDING
95 MOVIE SEQUELS CURRENTLY IN THE WORKS
US FBI, EAST HANOVER NJ, AND UNION COUNTY NJ SUED BY MAN WHO WAS 16 WHEN COPS TOSSED HIM DOWN STAIRS DURING WRONG DOOR RAID
NORMAN OK SETTLES SUIT FOR $40K TO MAN SHOT BY COP ... AND $174K TO COP THAT SHOT HIM & APPEALED BEING FIRED FOR IT
JARRETT: OBAMA NOT RELEASING COLLEGE RECORDS
FEDS CRACK DOWN ON AMISH FARMERS--FOR SELLING MILK
ELECTED OFFICIAL: I WORK THREE DAYS A WEEK
75,000 APPLIED FOR 2000 CHICAGO MCJOBS
MORE DEMS THREATEN TO VOTE AGAINST RAISING BORROWING LIMIT
STAY-AT-HOME KIDS: A WORLDWIDE PHENOMENON
An essentially free, essentially prosperous, essentially rational, essentially culturally dynamic America and western civilization must have been quite an exhilarating place in which to live and work. I wish I could have experienced it as an adult, but I was not born until 1978.
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